Still, there is this sense of impending doom, like something is just askew but I can't quite put my finger on it. Could it be that yesterday would have been our 41st wedding anniversary? I don't know. I've been fighting in my dreams with him so much lately that I wouldn't feel like celebrating that union regardless. How does the word "happy" go with the anniversary of a relationship that was marred by so many ugly memories?
I will freely and gratefully admit that God redeemed us and our tight little family. There were sweet moments of absolute communion between us and Holy Spirit. So many nights when he fell asleep listening to me reading scripture before bed. Those times where we prayed for each other, for our healing, for our children, and we did it together. By the grace of God we were able to complete our dream retirement by moving to Puerto Rico, living in my dream dwelling that looked more like a doll house than a small cabin on a farm. I will always treasure those last years together. Those were our best moments and that is what I miss, I suppose.
💚💚
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ReplyDeleteWow. This really hits hard.
ReplyDeleteIt’s touching how God healed so many parts of your marriage.
It’s apparent that you were thankful for the time you did have with you husband, and yet, you are growing and healing as well and you keep living.
Quite a testimony. It’s encouraging!🫶🙏